Posts tagged tumblr stake
Posts tagged tumblr stake
A couple of things.
1) I do not judge your pain as less than my own, BUT: I have totally felt the way you describe feeling in this post.
2) It doesn’t matter how good a person you are right now. It matters what direction you’re heading in. The direction matters more than the speed, BTW.
5) Putting off baptism is NOT the same thing as deciding to never get baptized.
6) It’s possible you’re having self-esteem, self-worth, or depression issues that have nothing whatsoever to do with whether you should get baptized and have a lot to do with psychology. Consider this possibility. It’s very normal, also, to be frightened of change. Fear does NOT automatically mean that a given change is bad or wrong or will be unpleasant once it’s over. I feel awful every time I go to therapy; that doesn’t mean therapy isn’t worth it.
(oh, and I’m not disappointed in you - just a little worried.)
I honestly feel that I’m just not ready. I don’t know if I ever will be but I don’t know if I will ever be a ‘church’ person. I don’t know if I could ever have God or Jesus be a centre focus in my life, it’s just not really who I am. I understand all the lessons and the points, but it’s like lately I’m learning without feeling. I just need distance. I want so many things in life that sound a bit selfish or whatever but I just can’t have those things and this. It would tear my family apart and I can’t do that feeling like I do right now. I just can’t.
The missionaries have been very concerned but nice enough about it and trying to talk it out. They are confused because I really understand the gospel well but I’m a good learner, I just am. And they are very impressed with my progress, but it’s just words sometimes. I just don’t think I’m a good enough person for this. I feel like I can’t change anymore, it’s pulling away things I love about myself, my life, and the world. I just want to be happy.
I know I’m letting a bunch of people down about this baptism thing and I feel so sorry for that.
I have a challenge for all y’all. Don’t be hating, I have Southern relatives.
Anyway. I want to challenge everyone to do what you’re good at - what you do for fun, what you do to relax, what you do just because you always do it - but do it for inherently churchy reasons.
Like, if you take photos as a way to relax and express yourself, take photos of stuff they’re asking for at Create.LDS.org and submit them.
If you’re a wizard at making videos, same deal.
If you like sharing your life story, head on over to Mormon.org and create a profile.
If you enjoy drawing anime characters, do anime versions of Nephi and his family, or David in the lions’ den, or Solomon’s temple, or your local temple.
If, like me, you get a bizarre kick out of giving other people advice, look for questions people have in the tumblrstake, Mormon, and faith tags - and answer their questions.
If you’re a tad obsessive (also like me,) spend time tagging photos and indexing in the Vineyard.
If (again, like me, because it’s a lot easier to come up with ideas for yourself) you are a techie, sign up to do beta testing and other projects on the Tech.LDS.org site.
And so on. Come up with something you do, but do it for God and for the building up of His kingdom.
Basically, I’m saying, try to - just a little bit, as an experiment - live the law of consecration. To learn more (abstractly) about this principle, check out this article from Elder Steven D. Oveson, Personal Consecration.
But I think the best way to learn about it is to actually try it.
I would like to start a blogroll of sorts, consisting of other faith-promoting blogs.
Just so you know, you can turn in the papers 120 days before the relevant birthday.
I felt called to go to Ukraine with ILP. -Didn’t happen.
I wanted to apply to BYU-I already. -Hasn’t happened.
I wanted to get a job. -Hasn’t happened.
All of these things I wanted to do really weren’t in line with Heavenly Father’s plan for me. I wanted to apply for college but I never could…
Here are some ideas to help you and your little ones stay awake and interested during General Conference:
1. Prepare. No one falls asleep when they’re having a massive spiritual experience.
2. Watch with specific questions or problems in mind and pray for the Spirit to help you find answers during Conference.
(From SugarDoodle: packets, links, videos, and more to help you, your friends, kids, and basically everyone prepare for and enjoy Conference.)